


A hanging Tale

by yesiamanowl



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Killian can't talk, Recovery, Season 4b AU, attempted suicide, not being able to talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-28
Updated: 2015-06-13
Packaged: 2018-04-01 17:21:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 22,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4028353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yesiamanowl/pseuds/yesiamanowl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU!verse of 4B. Killian and Emma have a fight after she gets too afraid of his love for her. Little does she realise that she has just taken everything away from him; leading him on to do something drastic</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A friend in need

** Killian **

This day had not been going well for Killian. Six weeks of peace was finally broken- not for the entire town for no big bad’s had shown up, but it had all gone wrong for Killian. Emma and Henry had been his everything, but Emma had decided that it was to stop. Their relationship, his friendship with Henry and David, all to stop- all because of him making that deal with the Dark One.

The argument that had brought it on was very long and very one sided- mainly just Emma shouting at him and him trying to keep it quiet, but to no avail she wanted him, the pirate who, in her mind, always lied and should be thrown across the town line knowing full well that anybody who crossed over the line could never return to Storybrooke. Killian didn’t put up a fight (much to the surprise of David) for he believed that he deserved every verbal beating he got. He believed with all his heart that he was a villain, and that he would never be enough for Emma. He had always known deep down that he hadn’t deserved her; so why did he keep trying? His heart had already gotten him into enough trouble as it stood, with Liam, Milah, Baelfire, and now Emma too. Once Emma had said what she had wanted to say, the reality of their argument sank in. He was never allowed to see or talk to Henry again, he was only allowed to work with David if it was completely necessary and there was nobody else who could do it, and worst of all- Emma never wanted to see him again. His heart felt heavy in his chest, just like when Emma had placed it back in, but only now it was the wrong kind of weight, the pain that demanded to be felt.

Although the weather was normal for one this early in January; cold, miserable and lonely- reflective of his mood really. His mind mulled over the words his love had said to him. _You’re nothing but a filthy lying pirate! Never go near my son again! I never want to see your face again_.  He had done so much to change for her and her family, he had followed her across realms and time, was trying to get used to her world whilst trying to protect them from those who would challenge the peace. But it wasn’t enough- it would never be enough for them, for in their eyes he would always be the good for nothing pirate who only cared about himself. And he wanted more than anything to try and turn back but he knew in his heart that he had changed too much to go back to piracy. He had seen his heart- it was bright red, so much purer than he could ever imagined.

So he planned. He planned to re-enact something he had done so many years before- something that made him far from human in the eyes of his brother. Never in three hundred years had he thought to try it again, to see if it would last, and to put him at peace with the world. And holding it in his hands once more, complete with the thirteen ties and his mother’s necklace; a cruel reminder that his family were all long gone. But this time? This time he would succeed and he could finally join them after three hundred years of being alone.

** David **

After Emma’s rather unexpected outburst at Hook, he had been determined to find him. But to the prince’s surprise, he was in none of his usual haunts, meaning he wasn’t at the white rabbit, he wasn’t at his room at Granny’s, and he wasn’t down the port either. The only thing that had worried him was that all his stuff was gone from Granny’s, the room left meticulously tidy and the key back behind the desk. But why would he give up his room if only to return to it later? Or maybe he had taken up Robin’s offer and gone to stay over in the merry men’s camp. He barely noticed Belle running up to him because he was so deep in thought, although she more or less ran into him snapping him straight out of it.

“How can I help you Belle?”

“We have to go to the woods and find Killian right now”

“Wait… how do you know that he’s missing… and the woods...”

“Look I’ll explain what I can on the way there but we have to hurry. And you may want to call an ambulance for on case we’re too late.” Fearing for Killian’s life he did as Belle said, but when her words finally came out, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“So what, this book turns up out of nowhere on the shelf you were stacking, holding a letter written by Killian’s brother saying that what he could possibly be preparing for right now has happened before?”

“Yeah although last time Killian had some sort of guardian angel watching over him. Now all he has is us” The rest of the drive was spent in an uncomfortable silence, but it was one that shouldn’t be broken, for all their minds could think of was what would be waiting for them when they got to the woods.

** Robin  **

The camp was unusually quiet that day, with most of the men going to the white rabbit to have a few and to watch the soccer match that would be playing on the television. He thought back to the amazing night he had spent playing poker and drinking with David and Killian, laughter filled that memory till it was full from all the shenanigans that occurred that night. A small smile crept across his face, relishing one of the happy memories which he had gained in just a few short weeks.

“Robin?” Regina called, snapping him out of one happy memory and into reality, a reality which all of a sudden, felt very wrong. “Can you feel it too? The feeling that something is really really wrong right now?” She questioned, an uncertainty resting in her voice that had never been there before.

Robin stood there, half about to answer the question, when his hunter senses kicked in. He knew right there and then where he had to go. And he knew it was to save one of the few men he could safely say was his friend but not a merry man. He had to save Killian Jones.

 

Both parties arrived at exactly the same time, just as Killian was jumping from the branch with the rope securely around his neck. Both Robin and David shot the rope, but it didn’t cut until all Killian’s weight was resting on it, joined by a resounding snap from his neck.

The next few moments went by in slow motion, from running over to their unconscious companion, to the paramedics rushing him to hospital in the back of the ambulance. The contortion in his neck just lying there in proof- proof that they may not have been in time to save their friend from himself. But when the surgery went underway, time slowed down to the point where three hours felt like three years. The silence between friends was broken by Dr Whale calling them down to the room which Killian had been moved to.

It was bare apart from the machines that lined the walls, with a lifeless body in the centre of the room. Had it not been for Killian’s rather obvious stump for a left arm, you would have never guessed that it was him, for he was generally very good at avoiding the hospital at all costs (the last time he had been to the hospital was when he was hit by a car. How long ago that was. Regina was the first to enter the room, for she had been standing right next to Robin when he shot his crossbow in an attempt to cut his friend down. She was closely followed by Belle, who had an important letter that was addressed to Killian from his brother that he was supposed to get three hundred years ago when Liam died, but he never got the message.

 


	2. Some far off horizon

** David **

Killian was lifeless in the hospital bed, all colour had long since faded from his skin, making him look more like a corpse than one of David’s closest friends. There were x-rays and various other scans hanging on the wall opposite the hospital bed showing the damage that had been caused by Killian’s suicide attempt. His neck had been badly broken, with his larynx shattered and his spinal cord damaged. The majority of his larynx had been placed back together by Dr Whale and his surgeons, but they hadn’t been able to save Killian’s voice, for the fragments that made up the bone and the larynx had shattered and damaged in a way that meant the bone fragments would have to be taken out for Killian to live more normally. The damage on his spinal cord was unknown, for until Killian awoke, they would have no idea how much mobility he would have left, and Dr Whale was refusing Regina from healing what was left of Killian’s neck for the magic would try to piece together the pieces that were no longer there, that could cause untold damage to Killian’s already destroyed neck. Thankfully they didn’t have to wait long before Killian awoke, but for the first minute or so they hadn’t known because he had no way of alerting them. Robin was the first to notice his friends awakening, immediately rushing to his side, trying to calm him down however was futile for he was more or less having a panic attack. The nurses were there soon with a sedative to calm him down and requested both the men to leave their friends side.

** Killian **

The first thing I saw was Robin and David in the hospital room around me. David was standing looking at some pictures on the wall that looked like they were a neck- presumably mine, whilst Robin was sat next to me. I opened my mouth to try and comment on them both being here, but no words came out. So I tried to move, but alas my body wouldn’t respond, and I could feel the panic slowly rising in my lifeless corpse. Robin noticed that I was awake and immediately tried to calm me down but it wasn’t working. I was going straight into a panic attack, just as I had when Liam was alive- come to think of it when I had come back the first time I had had a panic attack and he had brought me back; but the nurses gave me something that forced me to calm down. My thoughts were no longer clear- rather stars that I couldn’t fathom into constellations.

“Killian, can you hear me?” Victor said, almost tentative on the subject. Victor, like Emma, he was something as an open book to me, so I knew that he was trying to figure out just what I still had the ability to do. I could manage a nod of my head, but nothing more- my body no longer felt like my body, it felt more like a corpse- cold and lifeless. Victor ran his tests and told me exactly the damage that I had done to myself in my attempt to join my family; I had shattered a vertebrae in my neck which in turn had destroyed my vocal cords meaning that I would never be able to speak again. One of the lower vertebrae had dislodged into my spinal cord and had damaged it so that I would never be able to move my body from my neck down. As one of my closest friends in Storybrooke, Victor knew how to read me. He could see that I was giving up, giving up because I couldn’t move, I couldn’t talk; I would be stuck in this hospital room for the rest of my days and I couldn’t do anything against it.

It was dark outside by the time Robin and Regina came back into my hospital room, with a small Rowland not far behind. Regina had been with Robin when he had shot me down, just as Belle had been beside David. I couldn’t help but let out a small smile when Rowland starting jumping up and down, trying to catch a glimpse of the shadow that now lay in the hospital room, a man who was no longer himself.

“Why is uncle Kiyiyan so pale papa?” The simple fact that he still couldn’t say my name properly brought a smile to my face, for in the dismal wreck that was the hospital, he brought a bit of colour to the blinding white room.

“Your uncle Killian had an accident and hurt his neck quite badly”

“And we’re here to fix it!” the little boy exclaimed excitedly, and receiving a glare from Regina. It seemed he had let the cat out of the bag.

“Now I need you to stay very still Killian- or this could go horribly wrong” her words rang put against the walls. She said stay still but it was all I could do. I had only the mobility to slightly nod my response. But my thoughts were cut short by a blinding pain that stretched firstly from my neck, all the way down my legs and back again; and when it was over, I finally had my body back. I was slightly startled by Regina’s gesture, for she and I hadn’t exactly been mates, and yet she had come and fixed my neck so that I wouldn’t be stuck in a hospital bed for the rest of my days. So in turn I rewarded her with a gesture which she certainly didn’t expect to see from me, for as soon as the initial amazement of regaining control of my limbs had settled, I pulled her into a tight hug of which she couldn’t escape. And to my surprise she returned it- and I could practically hear Robin’s smile, especially if it was anything to go by little Rowland’s laugh.

“UP UP!” and true to form Robin picked up the boy and placed him by my legs- however that didn’t last long as he immediately clambered his way up to my chest so that I could give him a hug that was so tight that he tried to crawl his way out; making Regina and Robin laugh more than I had seen in days. But however happy they were, and however grateful I was for getting mobility back, it still didn’t chase away the darkness that had come to reside in my heart. _Or was it my mind?_ Either way, the darkness and sorrow still loomed above me like a storm cloud, preparing its bolts for another strike. One thing I did know about this darkness though was that it was just a little bit smaller; Robin, Regina, Rowland, David and Belle had all made sure of that. And for a moment, I could see a small shimmer of light on the horizon.

**_Thank you all for reading!_ **


	3. The gathering

** David **

The hours following my unexpected trip to the hospital for Killian were spent lying through my teeth to Emma, who had almost known from the instant I had walked through the door that I had broken her “No Killian” rule and she was absolutely livid about it. I had asked Killian if I could tell Emma, so she could know exactly what she had done to him, but all he did was shake his head. I could see him telling me with his eyes; _I don’t want her to love me or forgive me out of sympathy, but by her own choice_. The stubborn pirate and my daughter were better for each other than anyone would ever realise.

Thank god that Snow was more interested in Neal than what was going on with Killian- partly because she knew I would tell her later but also because she didn’t want the wrath Emma headed her way anytime soon.

“There is a reason that I didn’t want you to see Killian!”

“And what’s that? He’s one of my closest friends, and has proven himself to us over and over again, he isn’t who he once was!”

“No and that’s where you are blind! He still is the pirate who doesn’t care about anyone but himself!”

“What happened between you two Emma? One thing I know you and Killian are fine and he would do anything for you and the next thing I know you want nothing to do with him! And from me talking to him, nothing has changed at his end Emma; he would still go to the ends of the earth for you”

“David’s right, Emma. Killian hasn’t **Done** anything, I mean, he’s not betrayed us for the Queens of darkness has he?”

 Thankfully Emma listened to Mary-Margaret more than she did me- and Snow was right; Killian hadn’t betrayed us, if anything his loyalty to Storybrooke had become stronger over the past two months. Emma stayed quiet after Snow’s comment, thinking over her comment, however I doubt that her  mind would be changed. I knew this because she got it from me- I was one of the most stubborn people you could meet- although Emma’s experiences had made her almost twice as stubborn as me meaning that until she had calmed down completely over the Killian situation, nobody would be able to reason with her.

A couple of hours later, once Emma had gone to her new apartment by the docks, Snow asked me where it was that I had been exactly. I wanted to tell her; I wanted to tell her about what Killian had done to himself, that he was now permanently hospitalised (Until Regina got to him, they had said that they were going to try and fix his spinal cord with magic round about now), and that he would never be able to speak again. But Killian had given me the look that said _tell nobody_. He wanted to keep his accident a secret- however hard that may be in such a small town.So instead I told her that I had been with Killian in the woods, and that he staying out of the sight of the towns people for a while- until he could show his face without Emma wanting to throw him across the town line.

The hospital was empty that morning, meaning that I could hear a small child’s laugh from a mile off. Robin had evidently allowed Rowland to come and visit with him again this morning- but when I got to Killian’s room, I could not believe my eyes for the scene that was playing out in front of me. Killian was **moving** , and his neck was no longer in a weird position. On the walls, the new scans showed that his neck was now fine, apart from him now being a mute there was nothing wrong with the man. But none of this phased little Rowland, he was sitting up on Killian’s bed, laughing as his favourite “Uncle” was pulling stupid faces at him. I was about to enter the room when I heard Victor calling me from further down the corridor.

“How may I help you Victor?”

“Now Killian has his mobility back, he has agreed to learn sign language in an attempt to talk to those who are close to him. Robin, Regina and Rowland have all agreed to learn it with him, I am learning it along with the Merry men, and we were all wondering… Would you and Mary-Margaret like to learn it as well? That way we can all understand him still”

“It’s going to be a no from Mary-Margaret, for if I asked her to learn sign language she would immediately ask who it was for, but I will certainly learn sign language. It was hard enough nearly losing Killian when he was in the woods, but losing him through me not being able to understand him would be bad form on my part. But how will Killian be able to do sign language? He only has one hand?”

“Miss French found his severed hand in Gold’s shop and brought it down. Regina is going to re-attach it to Killian’s stump this afternoon. Not only will it mean he will be able to do sign language with us, it will also mean that we will have our friend back. Oh! And before I forget, I was wondering if you could get in contact with Grumpy, Killian’s phone was going off today because apparently he was supposed to meet Leroy down the docks as a semi- casual job interview”

By the time night arrived, there was an eclectic mix of people standing in Victor’s office, There was; Leroy, Robin, Regina, Rowland, Will Scarlett (surprisingly- it was no secret that he disliked the pirate, however he did enjoy drinking with him), Little John, McTuck, Ruby, Belle and Victor. Most people standing in the room had been told that the idea was they were all going to learn sign language, but only a handful of us knew exactly why. Leroy was the first to speak up

“Okay Charming- We are all here because we supposedly need to learn sign language. It’s all great up to the part that there are no mutes in Storybrooke” Those who didn’t know the situation all nodded in agreement, all bar Will Scarlett, who, by the looks of things, already knew what I was about to say.

“Who is it then Dave? Quite evidently there has been a mishap of sorts and we all somehow know this person, but what kind of an injury would take away a person’s voice?” Will called out. I simply nodded towards Victor to motion that he tell everyone in the room the news.

“An impact on his neck which was strong enough to shatter a vertebra in his neck, which in turn ripped his Larynx to shreds. It also paralysed him from the neck down, but thanks to Regina, he now has complete mobility of his body, and is almost completely fine bar the fact he no longer has a voice”

“no…” Ruby gasped- Emma had told her that she and Killian had had a fight and broken up, but after his absence she had just assumed that he was staying somewhere down the port. Robin and I could see the realisation cloud her eyes- that was until she started crying.

Leroy looked as though he was about to ask exactly who it was they were all there for; but the man who we had all just been talking about walked through the office door, a slight look of shock when he saw the amount of people all crowded into his friends small office. His traditional raised eyebrow towards me and Robin just going _why the hell are there so many people in here?_ Something that we were happier to see than I think anyone could have realised.

** Killian **

Dr Whale had already asked me earlier on in the day if I wanted to do sign language as a form of being able to communicate with others by myself and I had happily obliged. Little had I realised though that he was working in secret with Belle and Regina in a bid to get my hand back to me. Although I really should have seen it coming because you need two hands to do it successfully- but because of the strange concoctions Victor had me on I could barely think straight. I couldn’t wait to get into some proper clothes however, for the hospital gowns just made me feel indecent from the gaping hole at the back. Evidently someone had had the fore thought to place some of my modern clothes in a bag at the end of my bed for when Victor had finally cleared me for leaving the hospital room- but I wouldn’t be allowed to leave the hospital for a while longer; not until I had learned enough sign language to say the basic of what I needed and what I wanted. This was all fine by me, leaving the hospital room, for it finally meant the drugs which were clouding my mind were leaving my system whilst leaving me with a clearer head.

What I didn’t expect however was the large group of people who had been gathered in Victor’s office to learn sign language, just so I could be able to talk to other people again. By the time I opened the door the she wolf was already in tears, and when she saw me, Belle also broke down. The men just stood there in shock; for they hadn’t expected it to be me. I was the cocky pirate in their eyes; however in reality I was just broken.  Turning to Robin and Charming, I tried to ask them why so many people were in the room- after they had finished laughing at my response from having so many people in this one room.

Belle was the first to ask when I would be able to leave the hospital and what arrangements there would be. Grumpy just said sorry and offered me the job as harbour master still, and that I would just have to start when I had learned enough sign language. Rowland kind of just sat on my foot and refused to move whilst everyone else were trying to give me support.

Will was the first one to ask how it had all come around, and Charming and Robin said what they knew- but nobody knew the full picture. Emma had yelled at me and said all those things that made me break down the anniversary of my mother’s death. I had then proceeded to try and kill myself on the anniversary of my brothers- had charming and the others not found me that is.

And once more, I could see that there was still hope for me to have a life in Storybrooke. I just wasn’t sure how I was going to survive without seeing Emma.


	4. The letter of the long lost brother

** Belle **

A week had passed since I had told David to drive as fast as he could to the forest. A week had passed and now that Killian had become conscious once more, he had wanted to know how I had discovered what he was doing that day. This of course meant showing him the letter left by his brother which never made it to him (well at least that’s what we thought).

_How did you know Belle?_ He questioned, but not pushing me to say what I couldn’t yet say, I had always known that about Killian Jones (even when he was a pirate and was trying to kill me); he would never push someone to say something unless it was a life or death situation. Something I was rather glad of in the situation.

A small glance to my left showed me that he was still there, something I really didn’t think I could ever get used to; for I was used to hearing his comments on books, or just him being annoying in a fun way to try and distract my mind from my soon to be ex-husband. In that sense I viewed him as the big brother that I never had, something that over the past few weeks I had found immeasurably useful. I couldn’t read such a letter to him, the words nearly made me cry the first time; but he still deserved to know- preferably without me bursting into tears before I had read even the first line, so instead of reading the letter to Killian, I held it out to him, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall (I wasn’t very successful for as soon as Killian’s eyes touched the page the waterfall started).

** Killian **

It had been exactly a week since I had tried to take my life. It had been four days since I had woken up paralysed. Three since I had regained my body. Two since the gathering in Whale’s office to talk about sign lessons. But today I needed to know something that had been bothering me since I had woken up. _Just how exactly **had** Belle known my plans? And the location?_ But thankfully she had agreed to come to tell me how she had known my plans (I made another mental note to try and get a message through to Henry to say thank you for teaching me on how to text people).

Upon greeting Belle I could see that she was nervous about her big reveal. However I could never have expected for her to bring out a letter- in Liam’s handwriting no less. Her hands were shaking in anticipation (not in the good way), and wouldn’t still even when my own surrounded them. Once she had handed me the letter, the tears that had been building in her eyes started to roll down her cheeks. So I turned my attention to the letter that now rested in my hands.

_To my little brother,_

_I know that by the time you read this I will have passed on to the next life. And for that I am truly sorry, for it means that I have broken my promise to you that I would never die. I can hear you on the deck above me, taking control of the ship as I know you will very shortly become the captain of the Jewel. I know that the next few years are going to be hard for you- for I will be the last person for whom you have cared for who has died/abandoned you. I remember you when father left to become more powerful in his magic, when he left us to the dark one. That was the night you learned how to cry and scream quietly, trying to defend me and mother- however when he started the torture by getting into her head and making her use that knife to take her own life… I just need you to know Killian that it wasn’t because of you that she did it to herself. It was just the dark one playing with our minds. I realise that I can never compare my loss to yours, for you had to grow up being constantly reminded by father that you were the orphan that nobody wanted. I never believed that for one moment however- for they would have drowned you rather than given you to a family who could care for you, and on top of that they left their family crest with you; that means my little brother that they **want** you to find them, and that they had no other choice but to abandon you._

_To say the least in those few weeks we spent under the dark one’s torture, we suffered more pain than most feel in a lifetime. However the night we were finally freed is what has scarred me the most. I told you that it was all your fault that father had left us and why mother had taken that knife to her throat, and I told you that your life was worthless, and that nobody would ever care for you. I had told you to kill yourself in spite for I blamed you wrongly for what had happened to our family- when truth be told; **I knew it was not your fault**. But seeing you…hanging there from the mast… because there weren’t any trees….I swear to you my heart had stopped beating I instantly regretted everything I had said to you and I feared that I would never be able to apologise. Little did I know you had a guardian angel- or more accurately- a guardian star watching over you from the heavens. His name was lord Cygnus, the lord of the constellation we always followed home. He gave me another chance to be your brother and for that I will be forever in his debt. I still remember your face when he placed your lifeless body in my arms, apart from your evidently broken neck, you looked peaceful. And I remember how you coughed back to life, the injury gone and the light returning to your eyes. All I could remember saying for the rest of the week was how sorry I was, and how I had never meant to say those things. But you being you read me like a book and you said “ **you did mean those things brother, you just never had a good enough reason to say them”**. To say the least after that we became inseparable, just as brothers should be. _

_I remember the way we would find instruments in each port we visited, playing the songs that our crew would sing along to, something that the town’s people would always enjoy, no matter where we were. That was what gained our kings attention Killian- not the amount of armada’s that we had fought in and won, not for the amount of times we had to deliver important messages to other kingdoms, but the reactions we received from those who met us. He saw that the people would always trust us, so he deceived us into going to Neverland to retrieve the dreamshade, thinking that the people would trust his judgement because it was us he had sent to get it. I let my pride get the better of me brother… and that is something that I will take to my (very imminent) grave. I should have listened to you; I should have listened to that boy. And whatever you chose to do next, I ask you only one thing- leave **his** navy, I don’t care whether it’s to another or to become the very thing we have fought over the years, just never follow that man’s orders. _

_I know this will be hard for you Killian, but keep playing music, for it is the only time I have ever seen you truly happy. I hope in your future you find someone (something I have missed out on- love her enough for the two of us), I want you listen to your heart brother, and if it tells you to do something- you drop everything and do it. I don’t know exactly when you will get this message but I hope it is soon._

_And I know I am asking a lot of you in this letter, but I need you to promise me something. I need you to keep holding onto life- I ~~want~~ **need** you to promise my dead soul that you will never try to kill yourself again; or at least have people who are willing to help you if you get so low you feel like that is your only option. Please brother- **I can’t lose you too.** _

_And whatever comes to you in your future, I wish for good health and fortune; but most of all love that will shake you to your core and becomes the light of your life. Find that brother, and you shall find me._

_From your older (I may be dead but I can still use that title for a few more years) brother, William Noah Jones._

For three-hundred years I had wondered and feared about what my brother would think of my decisions, yet here it was, still in one piece after all these years, his final message.  I didn’t know whether to feel happy or ashamed that Belle knew the secret that made me all but human. I was beginning to realise just why Belle had burst into tears. She had found out about why I hated the dark one so much through my brothers words, and she felt ashamed to have fallen in love with the man she could now see as a monster.

I tried to take Belle into my arms, to try and calm her down, but she pushed me away. The confusion on my face was evident to her, but her question was one I could have never expected

“Why did you never tell anyone that you felt that way? Did you not feel like you could trust us to know what has happened to you or what was happening to you?” This is where I would usually give a speech on how that wasn’t what had happened at all, but alas- my voice was still gone so I improvised and grabbed a notepad that David had left for me to use and began to write;

_Know this Belle- I had never meant for anyone to be hurt by my actions, both in the past and present. But know this- it wasn’t because I didn’t entrust you with my past; but because I was too ashamed of it to tell anyone. I never mentioned what had transpired between me and the dark one all those years ago because I thought it would be of no importance, a reason for people to take pity on me (which Is something I hate more than being away from Emma). I sometimes wondered if the crocodile (also known as your soon to be ex-husband) had flashbacks of what previous dark one’s did to their enemies, for he would sometimes glance at me with only pain in his eyes- one not caused by Milah or Baelfire, but by something he had probably witnessed. No matter for it evidently wasn’t enough for him so he continued with his plan to crush my heart._

_But all that has passed now Belle- because I will share my past with you, or even play the song I used to for you: you just have to ask for I am no psychic I cannot tell what it is you want to know all the time. If I haven’t said it already Belle- I am sorrier than you shall ever know for ever hurting you, and now that I do know you (please do not take this the wrong way) I kind of see you as a younger sister- meaning I now sort of see it as my job to make sure you do not get hurt. I thought I would be doing everyone a favour by cleansing myself from the land, but I was sorely wrong. And I can see that now. Please Belle I know I do not deserve this but please stay by me, for I don’t want to be alone anymore. On the plus side I can make sure that Rumpelstiltskin can never hurt you again?_

After a while of writing I gave Belle my note, and that’s round about when the water works started again.


	5. Henry Discovers the truth

** Killian **

Two months passed before I was allowed to live outside the hospital, but in that time I had started my job as harbour master, I had helped Belle come to terms with the crocodile’s deception, and she helped me come to terms with mine and Emma’s break-up. That day was always in my thoughts, but the sadness was starting to slide, thanks to Whale referring me to the grass hopper who was something called “a psychiatrist"- even though I had no idea what one of those was I could definitely feel that it was helping me along my journey to recovery.

The dwarves had all managed to learn sign language pretty quickly, meaning I could talk to any one of them at any time whilst I was on duty at the port. At first I had stayed with Belle, until Leroy discovered that there was a harbour masters house by the port which now belonged to me- so of course Belle helped me move in, then moved in with me all before selling the crocodiles house. She was proud of herself for taking that step forward, and rightfully so; for every night I was there she would have nightmares or see a ghost of him in the halls.

The dwarves weren’t the only ones who had managed to pick up sign language quickly- for my drinking buddies had all decided that I should still be able to drink with them, meaning that; Jefferson, Will Scarlett, all the dwarves and David could all understand me (even when I was drunk). To say the least the rabbit hole did get rather full whenever we were in. My life was beginning to start again, something I had thought would never happen without Emma right by my side.

Charming was still going against Emma’s ‘no Killian’ rule. Much to the entertainment of pretty much everybody I knew and was friends with- but thank god Mary-Margaret had neither asked David nor seen me so she was still in the dark about my condition.

This morning was supposed to be just a regular day at the office (or so to speak) today for I would go about my usual routine; Get up, go to the hospital for more sign lessons, cooking lessons with Belle, Granny and Ruby, then going to work at the port, all before coming home of the evening to watch a movie or read a book (either way it entailed me learning pop culture and how to use modern day appliances). However fate had other ideas, for today Henry and Regina had had enough of his other mother’s ‘no Killian’ rule, and so they decided to go down to the docks just after I had arrived from cooking at my apartment.

** Regina Mills **

Henry had snapped this morning. He decided that he shouldn’t have to follow the ‘no Killian’ rule anymore and that he wanted to see him today. Or he wouldn’t talk to me or any of his other family members for a week until he was allowed to talk to him- so I decided to avoid that whole fiasco with Emma and go with him myself to see Killian; for at least that way there would definitely be a translator for Killian to use to talk to Henry. So here we were, nearly at the port after walking straight from the house ( _Killian prefers walking mom so I’m gonna walk there!_ )

“Why do you think he’s not calling anyone? I mean you would have thought he would of at least called me and tried to carry on normally”

“We both know why he hasn’t been doing that Henry. Are you sure you want to do this Henry? Because you may get a bit of a shock when you see the captain again”

“Wait… You’ve been breaking the ‘no Killian’ rule without me?”

“Yes. I haven’t told you why because he asked me not to. He wanted to tell you in person” _well as much as a mute can say anything._ By this time we had just reached the steps which led to the harbour masters office, the very office that I knew Killian would be in at that very moment.

“Can you wait here please Henry? I just need to see him quickly before you speak to him” Henry pulled a typical teenager move and shrugged his shoulders whilst going ‘fine’ in his best teenager voice.

As I reached for the door, I could see Killian deep in thought whilst sorting out some official port papers. I knocked on the door to gain his attention before walking into his surprising neat office.

_Hello Regina! What can I help you with today?_

_Henry pulled a fit at the ‘no Killian’ rule and he wants to talk to you_

_Does he realise that I can no longer speak?_

_No. He thinks you have been ignoring his phone calls- I try to tell him otherwise but he wouldn’t listen to me._

_I’ll happily talk to the boy- I’ll just need you there to act as a translator. Also well done, this is the longest sign conversation you’ve managed to have with me without accidentally swearing._

_I’m trying my hardest._

“Henry? You can come up now” His footsteps sounded throughout the small office as he ran up the stairs, not caring much if he nearly fell over on them. He immediately ran straight for Killian and gave him a massive hug- one which was reciprocated by Killian (I would be jealous of the pirate for being able to elicit such a reaction from my son- but then I remembered that he had no voice or any family left).

“Why have you been ignoring me Killian? You didn’t have to follow my mom’s rules! When it was all quiet I almost thought you were dead!” Killian let go of Henry when he said the word ‘dead’. He sent an almost accusing glare to say _did you tell him?_ I just shook my head.

** Killian Jones **

 “When it was all quiet I almost thought you were dead!” My blood ran cold at Henry’s words. How could he have known I had almost died that day? Had Regina told him? As if she could read my mind she shook her head to say there was no possible way for him to have known about any of that. I pushed the lad away so I would have some space to sign my response;

_I never meant to worry you Henry, and the reason I haven’t been able to return any of your calls was because Emma smashed my phone and I no longer have a voice._

“What’s with the jazz hands Killian?”

“What Killian was saying was that he had never meant to worry you, and that he hadn’t been able to return your calls since your other mother smashed his phone. But the other reason for him not returning your call...”

Regina’s voice was practically breaking by the end of the sentence, her mind reeling back to when she and Robin had found me; as they watched me take a last ditch attempt to end my life. Henry of course, was as observant and as smart as Emma, meaning that he took next to no time in realising that something had happened to me and I could no longer speak. Only then did he understand why I had been gone for two months, rather than the usual two days at most which he was used to.

_Regina? Everything I sign from now, I need you to translate word for word._

_Henry, the day your mother and I split up, I was torn into more pieces than I had been in for years- partly because she was unhappy with me for my deal with the dark one- yes she is still angry at me for it and I don’t blame her, but also because she had broken me on the anniversary of my mother’s death, and then I tried to kill myself on the anniversary of my brother’s. My attempt left me without mobility from my neck downwards and without a voice. Regina was able to fix my neck meaning I could move again, then she and Belle worked together to get my hand re-attached. After that a group of people, including David and Regina, all decided to learn sign language just so I could continue living here in Storybrooke. Any questions Henry?_

Regina was crying by the time she finished translating for me, and Henry wasn’t far behind. He hadn’t realised just how much damage his mother had done to me, but he could understand why I didn’t want her to know to know about it. Even though he could understand the reason I had been gone for so long, he was still annoyed at the fact that he hadn’t been included in learning sign language.

“Could I learn sign language? So I can talk to you myself rather than having a translator?” I nodded in my response, for I finally realised that Henry didn’t completely hate me for what had happened- he was just very **very** annoyed with me for not telling him sooner.

I ended up giving Henry my new number so he could text me- but I had him save me under my middle name; Artemis. That way if his mother ever checked to see who he was texting she wouldn’t know that it was me.

But what none of us could have foreseen was the arrival of the queens of darkness. Led by the crocodile, they wanted to find the author and change all the stories so that the villains had the happy endings- not the heroes. It seems like my absence from the sheriff station just got cancelled.


	6. Storybrooke under siege (again)

** Killian Jones **

Usually we heroes all run to the station and gladly work together whenever a new villain comes and strolls into town. Although every other time a villain has come to town Emma hasn’t wanting to rip my head off. Or limb from limb I could never remember which one she would rather do to me. But it didn’t take away from the fact that I was needed in her presence and the only way I was possibly going to survive this would be by teaming up with Regina, or David, or one of the dwarves at that moment I really couldn’t have cared less- for I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep it together if I had to work with Emma once more. I couldn’t risk the memories coming back after she more or less tried to set them alight.

_Any ideas as to why I’m being called into this David? I’m hardly anybody’s first choice of consultant when it comes to defeating villains; that’s your job not mine._

_Well suck it up Jones because you’re the only person in Storybrooke who has ever encountered the sea witch Ursula and lived to be here today. You’re also here because I want to prove a point to Emma that you are an outstanding man and she’s just being stupid about the whole situation. She may be my daughter but I can tell when she is out of order._

The sheriff station was near to bursting when David and I walked in, everybody trying to recall who each of the queens of darkness were- the only missing charming was the lady snow white, and from one of my previous conversations with the prince, she had met these queens before in the enchanted forest- so I suggested to David that he brought her in for reference on these queens.

_Which of these queens have you met before exactly Killian?_

_Ursula the sea witch. And she was working alone at that time so it must have been fairly recent that they bonded together._

_Fairly recent in our terms or in yours? Because last time I checked you were still saying that 30 years ago is recent._

_Well I met Ursula once when I was in the navy, then again when I was a pirate._

_Well seeing as there is only a couple of us who can understand you in this room I would suggest going to stand next to them whilst I go and get my wife in for casual questioning._

Emma was standing over her desk in a fashion that I had so sorely missed- the way her golden halo of hair settled so perfectly over her shoulders and ran like rivers along her back. Her bright olive eyes were alert and questioning, looking over every detail she could get her hands on.

I could feel myself falling for her all over again. Lost in thought, I almost missed the light tap on my shoulder from Belle. Her smooth, young features were marred in fear from the return of the villains.

_Do you think he will come for me? I mean I did throw him across the town line and…_ I grabbed Belle’s hands to quiet her thoughts

_No I really don’t Belle. Unlike everyone else who knows Rumpelstiltskin I know who he was before he took on the dark curse. And I know for a fact that that man would never intentionally hurt someone he loved._

_Didn’t he kill Milah though?_

_That was exceptional. He would never do that to you because he cares for you too much. He is willing to fight for you and that is something that you and Scarlett are going to have to watch out for. We may have started off badly but I know that he cares for you a lot. And also he is a friend so I’ll sign to Little John and get him and the others to watch over you both- no buts. And that is final. You are essentially the little sister I never had and I am not about to let this bastard hurt you._

_Little bit too over protective of me Killian- but I am glad that you care for me so much. It’s because of that that I came here. I got word that my soon to be ex-husband had rolled back into town and that you were going to be here. And because I am with you I feel safe._

_Well let’s try to keep it that way? Shall we?_

_Most definitely._

** Belle French **

“Belle! Are you okay? I mean he is most likely going to come after you seeing as you threw him over the line and probably hurt him” Emma called over to us, completely ignoring my existence in the room.

“Yes, I’m fine Emma. Killian and the merry men are going to be watching over me- and unlike you I actually trust Killian and can understand why he did what he did.” _In more than sense of the matter I suppose_ “I’ll stay out of the places that he’ll suspect me to be in. Meaning I’ll probably just stay in the apartment till I know that it’s safe”

“Apartment? I thought you were living at the mansion still?”

“No I sold it. Killian offered for me to move in with him as a roommate for his flat and I accepted. So I’ll be there if I am needed, plus at least one of the men watching over me can get books from the library for me to research with”

“Killian has a flat? Since when?” “Since he became harbour master of course” I knew Killian wouldn’t particularly like me telling Emma this because it would mean that she could easily find him and haunt him. It was bad enough with him having the nightmares of Rumple tearing his heart out and trying to crush it (in the dreamscape he was always successful), and he would try and call out for Emma, or for me; but because he was missing his voice he would have to walk around the flat until he saw that I was okay. It was tearing him apart, not being with Emma- but it was the only way he would be able to stay in Storybrooke. His brothers letter was what had kept us both going since it was found, because it had brought us even closer together so that we were more than friends in a completely platonic way. The look on Emma’s face made it completely clear that she hadn’t heard of Killian getting a job or moving out from Granny’s. She had probably never looked either; and she probably wouldn’t try and find the apartment unless Henry was thought to be there (which would probably be happening soon enough seeing as he knew about Killian’s ‘accident’.

“I may not trust Hook, but I can trust the merry men will keep you safe. Where is he actually because he was here a moment ago” “He will have gone to call the merry men and Will to update them on the situation. No doubt that he will be back soon” “Well… I guess that’s a good thing” Her voice sounded uneasy- the way that she would only speak when a villain had truly confused her.

“Why is that a good thing?”

“Because it means I don’t have to have **that** conversation with him despite the fact that it is two months overdue.  I mean, I can kind of see why he would want to get his hand back, but the lying and the deal with Gold just made his betrayal even worse. Not to mention I’m pissed with him for thinking that I am so shallow that I wouldn’t like him just because he was missing a hand.” _Oh if only you knew Emma._

A knock on the door pulled us from our thoughts- it was David and Snow, but something was wrong with the picture. Or more accurately something was wrong with Snow.

_Watch him for me Belle and make sure nobody unsavoury finds out about Killian_

_I have it David._

** Killian Jones **

I had sent a message to the merry men and Scarlett to get themselves to my apartment to sort out Belle’s protection, and each had agreed (Will had added for everyone to get there as quickly as possible for he didn’t want anything to come to Belle, he had _some_ feelings for her by this point- so he had to add some incentive for them to hurry up; whoever got there last would have to buy a week’s worth of drinks for the rest of us).

I was just about to leave when David arrived with Mary-Margaret. I had known that there would be some animosity between her and myself, but I certainly hadn’t expected for her to slap me quite that hard on our first encounter in two months.

“Snow! Why the hell did you do that??”

“David! Don’t you see? He has caused Emma pain with his betrayal- and so he is going to have to tell me himself why he hasn’t come to try and at least explain to anyone of us why he did what he did”

_Ready to translate Charming?_

“Fire away when ready Killian”

_Your daughter specifically told me not to talk to you and as I am sure you are aware your husband has already had quite the earful of it already. If I were able to tell you about what had happened after what transpired between me and Emma I would. I truly would- but for that I would need a voice._

“Oh my god….”

“So that’s where you’ve been going… You’ve been going to the hospital to learn sign language for Killian…”

“Yes and Emma cannot know about it. About any of this. She can’t even know about Killian”

“Oh my goodness I am so sorry Killian I didn’t know”

_And you weren’t meant to_

“What’s he saying David?” “Thank you”

_Send Belle back to the apartment when you can David because between the merry men and I we need to devise a plan to protect Belle from the crocodile._

_Got it. Be careful yourself though- I don’t want to lose another friend_

_Sorry but you can’t get rid of me that easily._

I laughed to myself as I went out. Yes I had never intended for the Lady Snow to find out about my situation, but that wasn’t why I was laughing. I was laughing because of how alike David was to Liam- for he would have said something similar to me. And our unlikely friendship that had spawned after my accident was a bloody miracle- and one that saved my life.

Now I just had to figure out how to stop the crocodile from hurting Belle.


	7. I meet August and the crocodile (again)

** Killian Jones **

Three days had passed in succession without an incident- well apart from the lady Snow white from discovering that I no longer had a voice. Regina had been sent in under cover to work with the Queens of darkness and to discover what they were planning. During this time I had managed to work with Will to get Ursula her happy ending- something that I had stolen from her many years ago; her singing voice. Once I had helped her to get her happiness back, she had told Will and I exactly what the dark clan were planning, and it was something more unsavoury than I could ever have imagined.

They were going to turn Emma dark and get her to help them to destroy our happy endings (well… those that had them) and gain theirs in the process. Will had managed to get the message to David when everything went dark.

The gentle smell of the salted sea had been replaced by the strong the forest. I was tied down to a chair in what looked to be a small wooden lodge, with a fire opposite the door, and another man tied up in the other corner. Even though I had never met the man before, I had quickly pieced together that he was August Booth, also known as the grown up version of Pinocchio. His blue eyes stared right at me, in waves of confusion and worry- for he had known me (from the book of course) as a villain, and the worry… well I could only hazard a guess as to what he had been through since he had been captured.

“Well isn’t this just lovely. We have the saviours pet pirate and the one who knows the most about the author- and both are just deliciously handsome; You know Rumple, I could get used to this” Cruella’s voice was arrogant and accented, not too far from his own when he was a villain- she looked down on August with a feeling in her eyes which I couldn’t place. Perhaps it was lust, or scheming, or if we were really unlucky she may have been planning to change our forms. _Oh as though having your hands bound and being a mute wasn’t good enough you had to think of that didn’t you? I have to get out of here- and there is no way in hell that I am leaving August here with these cronies._

“Well Cruella, you’re just going to have to enjoy this while you can, for I have plans for the pirate. Or more accurately, I have plans for what I am going to do as the pirate. As for Pinocchio… Well you can just leave him where he is for the moment; although I do have a feeling that we may not have to wait much longer till we find the author and these two are out of our problems.”

“So what am I supposed to do when you are prancing around town a few inches taller than you’re used to”

“Put them in the basement. You will find that there are adequate places for you to tie them to opposite walls so they cannot escape- so you may as well just take of their gags and soundproof the place before coming back into town”

And so Cruella did as her master asked of her. She had tied August closer to the door, with me directly opposite from him, our ankles touching in the confined space.

“However tempting it is to keep you both locked up to the walls in here, I must say I’m rather partial to allowing you some breathing room. Of course you can’t leave this room even if you tried but seeing as you will probably never move or see the light of day again I would make the most of it” Cruella had used her magic to remove all our bindings before she turned and left. August was the first to move.

“You know… when I read your story- well what was in the book, I’d always imagine that you’d be more talkative. And more desperate to escape”

_You have no idea_ the signing had become almost as natural as speaking had once been now that I was close to fluent in the language.

“Wait… are you signing?” I nodded, grateful that he had caught on so quickly.

“I thought you had a voice- the stories said you could bellow across a deck and be heard a mile away” _When I had my voice, that was indeed the case. But since I have lost it I am more or less a waste of space. I can only talk to those who know how to sign and even then it’s not as detailed as I would wish. I just have to come to terms with the fact my 350 years of being a pirate has finally come to bite me in the ass in the form of “Karma” as Henry calls it._

“Okay I got all of that but the fifth last word, could you write it down?” When I showed August what that symbol meant, he laughed at the entire meaning.

“Well I can most certainly agree- Karma is most certainly a bitch”

August and I were able to continue chatting for the most part of the morning and part of the afternoon, our topics ranging between our pasts and people we knew. He had learned how to do sign language when he was in high school (god knows how old he was when he was there), and he had kept practising for years after in case it ever became useful. I told him in return about everything that had happened in Storybrooke lately (between me and Emma especially) since he had been a boy, for even though he had been here he hadn’t been able to keep up with how she was doing. They had been having a discussions about motorcycles when the crocodile walked in to find us slouched against the wall, with August in mid-sentence and me… well I wasn’t bound or in pain which displeased the crocodile to no end.

“You are coming with me, and this time? There won’t be a single type of pain that you aren’t feeling by the time I am finished with you” August looked at me apologetically and almost looked concerned for what was about to happen to me. For unlike him, if the crocodile tried to get me to answer questions, I wouldn’t be able to communicate for he had bound my hands and being a mute pretty much does as it says on the tin.

“So you got your hand back in my absence. I do not recall giving anyone permission to do that” I simply glared back at him, knowing that he probably wouldn’t bother to see my facial expressions during this hell- meaning there would be a lot of pain before he stopped.

“Oh so you’re giving me the silent treatment are you Captain? Let’s see if that is still intact when I start inflicting pain” and pain he gave, wave after wave; getting progressively more and more painful with each wave. He tortured me till the night fell, and it was then that he made a shocking discovery about me. Of course to most of Storybrooke it was old knowledge but he had been away for quite some time.

“We’ve been at this for nearly five hours **Hook** , and still you say nothing. It’s almost like you’re a mu….” The dark one turned to stare at me as he almost said the “M” word- even though I use the word a lot in my mind I know that it is bad form in this realm to call someone by it. In his eyes I could see curiosity, and what almost looked like…Shock? He promptly left to retrieve a dream catcher- and what he would see would trigger something that not even I could have predicted.

For as the crocodile began to look through my memories, he also started to remember things from the dark one before Zozo, a man named Ramonic- the dark one who had tortured my brother and I all those years ago…

_The past_

_The cells in the dark one’s castle were dark and damp and filled with every kind of fear imaginable. In the cell opposite Killian and Liam was a beggar from another land who had attempted to find the dark one and instead became one of his prisoners. Zozo couldn’t see much of the two boys in the cell, but he could pick out the smaller ones piercing blue eyes staring at him, with what looked to be his mothers and brothers body at his feet- but he didn’t cry, at least not out loud. For a child so young he was incredibly brave; not to mention he had probably been in more pain in his short few years than most would ever feel in their entire lives. It was then that the dark one came back into the room, sending the child to the back of the cell in fear._

_“Well, well, well. Look who’s finally awake- I didn’t put you in too much pain did I? For if I did this next part would be no fun!” He grabbed the small boy by his left hand and dragged him to a room at the end of the dungeon, and within minutes, and ear piercing scream could be heard from there to the end the world._

Rumple almost fell backwards, at what I do not know, but when his eyes finally met mine again, all that filled them was pain, sorrow and remorse. He had looked back too far and found out about what one of the previous dark ones had done to me and was either feeling my pain or was remembering Ramonic’s memories of the entire procedure.

“All this time… you sat by and watched as I became the dark one… fearing that I would become like Ramonic” I nodded “Why was he so lonely? Did he not have a family” a desk appeared with a pen and paper in front of me as my hands, apparently he was wanting an answer and he couldn’t be bothered to attempt signing.

_Would be easier if I could sign it to you_

I wrote, and immediately he understood what I was getting at- he could look through my memories from the previous few months and learn every sign that I knew, allowing him to understand me.

_Well now that business is over, Ramonic didn’t have any family because he murdered them after he thought his wife was having an affair with him when in fact she was just terrified of him, and its because of that bloodshed that no dark one after him has been able to love anyone- whether they be family or lovers- because of Ramonic no dark one can ever experience love._

"So… the reason I cannot keep those I love close is because I can't love them as much as I should"

_Basically_

"But why isn't Miss Swan coming to get you? When I left you both you were incredibly close"

_Why do you want to know all this? Leverage? Blackmail? Because if you wanted to destroy me you're a bit late- Emma has already broken me._

"I want to know because I now know why my heart feels wrong; and I want it gone"

_You want to rid yourself of the dagger and all its power? Well I did say to you that it was power or love, and now I need to know if you're not going to screw me over when this is all over_

"I swear I won't, just please help me and then I will help you in return"

_The plan perhaps? The reason why they are here in Storybrooke because it most certainly isn't for a second chance_

"Deal. They want their happy endings. Now you have to help me get rid of the dagger"

_The basement of the sorcerer's house. I found an area that would have been suitable for this kind of thing when I was helping Henry with something. Get us there and we can continue._

I could see the dark red smoke of his magic surround me, and just through the small gaps of the magic I could see that we were in the great hall of the mansion- apparently he didn't know how to get into the basement.

I led him through the passages that took us to the basement, but the sight that awaited us was far from what I had been expecting. Somebody had already set up the ritual necessary and laid out the ingredients. Upon a table by the entrance, I noticed a small note with my name on it, on unfolding it, all I could see was a blank page, but then words started to appear;

_To Killian Jones,_

_I am aware that you are going to be removing the dark curse from Rumpelstiltskin and I figured that you could probably do with some help setting up- so I have laid all you should need out on the tables and have drawn the sigils necessary_. _If something is missing I have placed a cupboard which can locate any spell ingredients on your command, nobody else's however. I am aware that you do not have a voice to explain to him what he needs to say so I have left the ritual in the circle for him._

_Good luck._

_The Sorcerer._

Looking around the room I could see everything that the Sorcerer had mentioned, and quickly set up the final preparations for the ritual I had known since I was young, but never actually cast for otherwise there would be no dark one.

_Stand in the centre of the sigils. Now read out the parchment in front of you._

As Rumpelstiltskin began to read the words on the parchment, a strange gold glow began to emanate from the sigils on the floor and walls, and through the ever increasing light I could see him standing the circle, doubled over, and what looked to be… bleeding- the was a thick red substance running down his face and I was just hoping that was the curse rather than actual blood

A mangled scream sounded from the centre of the circle as the light faded, and once cleared, I could see the unconscious body of the crocodile, and the dagger next to him, slowly turning to dust.

"Ah… Wha… Did it work?"

_I would say so yes. I'm going to contact David and pass on their plan. Let's get you above ground and away from this place._

**K: David, come to the Sorcerers house, I have had a development.**

**D: You're alive! We were really worried!**

**D: Ok, me and the guys are at yours, we may of found a plan of action through your notes**

**K: Notes? And is August with you?**

**D: Yes August is here, and your notes from the Navy- there a quite a few good battle plans here and one will work against the queens of darkness and Gold**

**K: You can take Gold off your list of problems**

**D: WHAT!**

**K: Just get here quickly and it will all make sense.**

**David Nolan**

It had been 36 hours since anyone had last seen Killian, and when we had found August, we had found out why. He had been captured and had been with him for a short time until Gold had taken him away. Thankfully he could understand sign language and didn't tell Emma about Killian's predicament. Seems Killian was adamant in his secret staying that way.

"Thank you August"

"What for David?"

"Not telling Emma"

"Well he said not to and I wasn't about to break his trust. I must say it was a surprise to see him, and the lack of a voice just added to it."

"How long since he had arrived?"

"Somewhere over 30 hours for sure I know- but I'm not exactly sure about anything else for there wasn't exactly a clock for me to tell the time with"

"Do you know what happened to him when he was here?"

"Well about 10 hours of being in the basement Gold came and took him away, saying something about putting him in every type of pain possible"

We had pulled up outside of Killian's apartment when August said the last words he had heard from Gold. Had he really taken Killian away and tortured him? Was he still alive for that matter?

"Oi! Dave! Did you find him?" Scarlett shouted from the apartment's door- in comparison to everyone else in the rom he was by far the most agitated and worried over his friends disappearance

"Well we know where he **was**. As for where he is know we have no idea."

"What do you mean where he was?"

"He was a prisoner with me at the log cabin that Gold owns. He and I were together for a space of time, but then Gold took him away to torture him" August cut in. There wasn't a single face that wasn't filled with shock or fear

"But without a voice… He won't be able to tell Gold to stop! He could kill him!"

"I know Belle, and we are doing everything that we can. But for now we need to find a battle plan for the battle that is inevitably coming now that they are here and Gold is in the picture."

Three hours later and thanks to Belle's expert level of researching abilities, we had found a suitable battle plan in Killian's old naval notes that were cleverly hidden away in places no one would think to look.

*Beep Beep*

"Who's phone is that?"

"It's yours David…. It's Killian! Killian sent you a message!"

**K: David, come to the Sorcerers house, I have had a development.**

**D: You're alive! We were really worried!**

**D: Ok, me and the guys are at yours, we may of found a plan of action through your notes**

**K: Notes? And is August with you?**

**D: Yes August is here, and your notes from the Navy- there a quite a few good battle plans here and one will work against the queens of darkness and Gold**

**K: You can take Gold off your list of problems**

**D: WHAT!**

**K: Just get here quickly and it will all make sense.**

I quickly grabbed the keys to my truck and Belle followed me into the truck, on a journey that would provide us with new knowledge, and a few more surprises than we could ever have expected.

Comments?


	8. The crocodile is no more

** Emma Swan **

It had been more than two months since I had seen _him_. Since I had told him that I never wanted him to sees any of my family or I ever again. Looking back I realise that was probably a bad idea, because we were the only family that he had left, and I had thrown him away, just as his father had done. But I still stand beside my words- well… that was until I had to see him at the station, looking at Belle, but not speaking. If I was closer I wondered if he was deliberately being silent as to not gain my attention. But the maps and papers in front of me were more important than his presence right now. Not when we had potentially four big bads in the town of Storybrooke, and seeing as they all keep calling me “The Saviour” I may as well live up to the name and keep doing what they expect me to do.

Except my curiosity for Killian’s abnormal quietness was getting stronger and stronger by the second. He always spoke to those he met, he saved the “speaking without speaking” for her. It wasn’t till a moment later when Leroy had moved slightly that I noticed Killian had **both** of his hands and was… signing to Belle? I then remembered that it would probably be a good idea to talk to Belle seeing as one of the new threats was her ex-husband.

“Belle! Are you okay? I mean he is most likely going to come after you seeing as you threw him over the line and probably hurt him”

“Yes, I’m fine Emma. Killian and the merry men are going to be watching over me- and unlike you I actually trust Killian and can understand why he did what he did. I’ll stay out of the places that he’ll suspect me to be in. Meaning I’ll probably just stay in the apartment till I know that it’s safe”

“Apartment?” My thoughts were in overdrive by this point; I knew everyone in this town- how had I not heard of Belle getting an apartment or even moving out of Gold’s mansion? “I thought you were living at the mansion still?”

“No I sold it. Killian offered for me to move in with him as a roommate for his flat and I accepted. So I’ll be there if I am needed, plus at least one of the men watching over me can get books from the library for me to research with”

“Killian has a flat? Since when?” _This just adds to the confusion_ , I muttered inwardly cursing at this change of events. _Of course Killian was moving on. But how was he financing it? Surely he doesn’t have enough doubloons for that?_ “Since he became harbour master of course” _Wait… Killian got a job? As harbour master? How am I only hearing about this now!_

“I may not trust Hook, but I can trust the merry men will keep you safe. Where is he actually because he was here a moment ago” “He will have gone to call the merry men and Will to update them on the situation. No doubt that he will be back soon” “Well… I guess that’s a good thing” I decided to leave all the emotion in that line for Belle to pick up on, for out of everyone in Storybrooke, she understood the most. She knew what it was like for someone you loved to turn their back on you, and betray you.

“Why is that a good thing?”

“Because it means I don’t have to have **that** conversation with him despite the fact that it is two months overdue.  I mean, I can kind of see why he would want to get his hand back, but the lying and the deal with Gold just made his betrayal even worse. Not to mention I’m pissed with him for thinking that I am so shallow that I wouldn’t like him just because he was missing a hand.”

Belle turned away slightly at my last comment, but I had no time to question why for my parents walked into the station, but something was drastically wrong. My mom looked almost like she was going to collapse from shock.

“Are you alright mom? You look like you are about to pass out”

“They’re back. I’m terrified of what they might do Emma” _Lies_

“You know these people?”

“I know that they are dangerous and will do anything to stop us heroes”

** Belle French **

I left the station to allow David and Snow some time with Emma to figure out what was going on. I also needed to get back to the apartment to see what kind of plan Killian and Will had devised for my safety whilst Rumple was back in town.

The apartment was near bursting when I came in, nearly all the merry men were in the lounge, the dwarves were in the kitchen talking rather animatedly to Killian and Will. _I wonder if this makes Killian the unofficial leader of the merry men now._

_Belle!_ Killian knocked on the counter with three knocks, then two slower knocks as a greeting, something Archie had suggested so that he wouldn’t have to be directly in front of someone to greet them.

_What are you smiling about? I’m pretty sure Will can see it even with his back turned to you_

“I was just wondering seeing as Robin’s not here but all his men are, does that make you the new leader of the merry men?” I didn’t usually vocalise my conversations with Killian out of respect for him, but I wanted everyone in the room to laugh or even smile, for it would take away the atmosphere of someone possibly dying. True enough my plan worked and everyone laughed, Killian even going as far as doing an impression of Robin when he would summon his men.

“Well shall we get why we are actually here? We have to decide on how to keep Belle safe” A collective murmur spread throughout the group, nodding with Will’s proposition.

The group quickly agreed on a way to keep both Will and Belle safe from the crocodile and his wenches, although we had managed to figure out that one of the queens of darkness was in fact Ursula, and Killian knew what her happy ending was- her singing voice _I should know, I’m the one who took it from her._ Killian may not have been able to say the words or convey his feelings but it was evident to those of us who could understand him just how much he hated himself for taking away Ursula’s singing voice.

I watched from the side lines as Will and Killian gave Ursula her voice and her father just three days later, watching as a burden was lifted from Killian’s shoulder. His eyes once more held that light that made him different, I could see it in the way he carried himself, he was happier now, as if he had been the one who had been freed instead of Ursula.

_You two carry on to the apartment, I won’t be far behind._

_Are you sure that’s wise Killian? Rumple could…_ Killian held my hands to stop me, and simply looked into my eyes to say that he would be alright.

“I’ll be back in a minute then pirate” Will called out as he took my arm to lead me back to apartment which was acting as my safe haven and prison.

Will had been nothing but exceptional these past few days, holding me close when I was afraid, whispering words of confidence and making us all laugh even when feelings were running low.

I was leaning into him walking into the apartment when we heard it. A scuffle on the port where they had just been standing with Killian, something being hit and then silence. Will and I ran to where we had just been, but Killian was gone. And in his place, a note. Written by none other than my ex-husband;

**_If I were you I would start preparing the funeral_ **

** Killian Jones **

Time seemed to slow down to a standstill as I waited for David and Belle to arrive. I could feel the sunlight coming through the window gently, like a silent psalm calling to all. I thought about I had learned between the crocodile and Ursula. They were planning on turning Emma dark, and if that failed- destroying her. I tried to think of a way that I could avoid Emma going dark, a way to keep her in the light, when it came to me. No doubt Maleficent would have a hideout in the caves somewhere within the forest, and if we could ambush her and stop her plans, maybe, just maybe I could save Emma from the darkness which once consumed me. Out the corner of my eye, I could see the crocodile leaning against the wall, struggling to stand without a cane. He refused to make any eye contact with me, and I suspected that all the memories from Ramonic were pouring through him, seeing all the horrors that he committed under that darkest of curses. I had no doubt in thinking that the man beside me was no longer the crocodile, but instead Rumpelstiltskin, doting Husband, loving father, but he was no longer a coward.

I heard the door open and feet running down the hall towards the ball room where I was awaiting my friend’s arrivals.

_Oh my god Killian are you alright? Did he hurt you?_

_Yes, but I will live, although a trip to the hospital might be needed._ I leaned onto both David and Belle, taking away some of the pain that was coming from my lower body.

_Don’t worry we’ll get you there-_ “why exactly isn’t gold a problem anymore though?”

“Because I now know the errors of my ways. Jones helped me get rid of the dark curse, something not even I thought was possible, but he had known how for over three centuries. Belle I know I do not deserve your forgiveness, but it is all I ask for, and maybe a cane so I can walk” Rumple spoke softly, but firmly, although however much he tried, he couldn’t hide the pain in his voice. The procedure had been painful for him, and then he had to deal with all the pain coming through from his “new” memories.

David eyed up Gold with only hatred in his eyes, but I could see that he was beginning to understand why I had said why he would no longer be a problem.

“I know you may not trust me David, but please, let me tell you where Maleficent is- the Captain already knows what she is planning but she doesn’t know of my deception yet and you should use that to your advantage and stop her from completing her plan”

“And what is her plan”

_To turn Emma dark._

David looked at me as though he had seen a ghost. He reeled back slightly, making me lean more onto Belle. As I looked to David, I saw an expression I never thought I would ever see on him. He was keeping something secret, something that I had a sneaking feeling that may have something to do with Emma going dark.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to ask him until later, but even when we eventually got back to my apartment (after a detour to the hospital) I still didn’t know how to approach David on the subject, and even when I had, David was leaving. No doubt to go and tell the Lady Snow about Maleficent’s plan with Emma, but I knew I couldn’t fight the growing sense of doubt in my gut about David’s secret. I just hoped that it wouldn’t have any repercussions.

**I know that this is coming to an end, but I love to hear what you guys all think of my stories! (meaning please comment + kudos <3)**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I know I have just brought all this up to date but infortunately that is where my spam of uploads finishes for this story *sad face* but thankfully I have nearly finished the final chapter so that'll be up soon, then the epilogue sometime after that! Kudos and Comments much appreciated!


	9. The dragon's lair

** David Nolan **

Rumpelstiltskin’s words were burning in my mind for I knew exactly what Maleficent would be planning if she was to turn Emma dark. She would use our secret to turn Emma against us- against the light that has always been in her life. I could see Killian was trying to get my attention for something but my mind was preoccupied. I knew that Snow and I would have to tell Emma about Maleficent and her child, but I also knew that that would play straight into her hands, turning Emma down a dark path which could only end badly for all of us.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Killian giving me a sympathetic glance- I didn’t know how, but he always knew how to make me feel better. Perhaps I could have him there when Snow and I told Emma about what we did. I just knew that whatever this final showdown entailed, we would all get hurt- I was just hoping for no fatalities.

** Killian Jones **

I could see David deep in thought, and I knew it had to do with Maleficent and Emma, and I tried my best to give him a reassuring smile- and thankfully he caught wind of it and calmed down a bit before he tried getting me into the car to go to the hospital. I was really starting to hate the hospital now, for I had spent so much time in there after my accident, then on top of that I had to continuously for sign lessons with the therapists. Now I had to go in because of the damage that Gold had done- although it almost looked like he was going to have to see a psychologist for everything he was being forced to relive.

“I need to be in the insane asylum under the hospital” I heard Gold say to Victor, and I just nodded to Victor and they disappeared. All my thoughts were messed up- I couldn’t think straight for whatever pain killers they had given me so that I would be more comfortable. I could see my vision blurring together as I finally lost consciousness, but before everything went black, I could have sworn that I had seen Emma at the door, looking over me as fell into the void.

When I awoke there was someone in the corner of the darkened room, but I couldn’t see who they were, and I couldn’t exactly ask them to show themselves, so I watched them. They were slouched against the wall in such a way that I couldn’t tell whether it was a man or a woman standing there, and I couldn’t see their hair for they were wearing a hood, but whoever they were they were quite soundly asleep despite the fact they were standing up. I could feel myself being pulled back into the void and at that moment I could see my watcher turn around, but I was gone before I could see their face.

I was greeted by Dr Whale in the morning, and he lowered my medications so that I could actually communicate with him again.

_Hello Victor_

“Hello Killian, how are you feeling?”

_Like my body has been ripped in half and shrewdly put back together again_

“Well that’s to be expected; you were tortured just yesterday- although he looks rather sorry for himself this morning when we went to give him some meds”

_He is reliving every bad moment and act that every dark one before him has committed, it’s quite a painful process from what I gather_

“That would make sense after seeing him today”

_Did I have any visitors last night Victor? I saw someone in the corner_

“No one that I know of- the visiting hours would have been closed after that point- although I do know that Emma was here to see Gold and talk to him about what he did and she ended up here instead. To say the least her reaction was not what I was expecting- I thought she was going to have a fit with David for being here with you, she instead asked what happened to you and if you were okay. I think Emma is finally seeing sense when it comes to you”

_Or perhaps she was wondering if whatever got to me was going to attack the town_

“I wouldn’t say that, Emma had genuine concern in her voice- trust me, I just know”

_Fine. How ling till I can leave? Or have visitors?_

** Emma Swan **

I had never expected to see Killian in the hospital after his disappearance. Some people thought he had jumped town so that he wouldn’t have to put up with any of the crap attached to living here whilst others thought that he had been captured by Gold and Maleficent and possibly tortured. I had agreed with those who were saying he had jumped town- not because I felt it, but because it was easier to accept. Killian leaving Storybrooke after everything that I had put him through, and what other people had been saying about him since we had broken up. But seeing him nearly unconscious in a hospital, with bandages and wires on him made it all real. He **had** been tortured- no doubt because Gold would assume that he and I were still a thing, but however much rationalising I did I couldn’t escape one thought **_He’s here because of me_**. David had said that when August had come back around, he had revealed that Killian had been with him, before Gold took him away, threatening that there wouldn’t be a single type of pain he wasn’t in. But that would only mean physical pain seeing as through my actions I have managed to put him through pretty much every single type of pain since I had killed things between us.

Then I remembered the real reason I was here at the hospital; Gold. He had been placed a few doors down from where Zelena was (disgustingly pregnant since she disguised herself as Marian). Gold was a wreck, not to mention completely unresponsive to my questions. As I turned to ask why he wasn’t answering one of the nurses told me they had no idea why he wasn’t answering, and that he hadn’t since he had arrived. I knew that it would be best to wait until he was coherent enough to give me a proper answer, but then I realised… Gold had arrived with Killian, meaning that David may know what was going on.

“Dad, what’s going on?”

“With Gold or with Killian?”

“Both. I need to make sure everyone else is still safe”

“Or do you just need to make sure Killian’s okay?” I brushed off David’s less than subtle attempt at trying to admit that I may have been wrong about Killian- of course I no longer wanted harm to come to Killian, but that didn’t mean that I wanted to see him in pain. I thought I had no more feelings for Killian, but when I saw him on that hospital bed, it was almost like my heart had started to beat again (despite the fact that it had never stopped)

“Gold tried to torture Killian, not too long after that we found August, turns out Killian had something stashed away for a rainy day- a way to destroy the dark curse. Something Gold did apparently reminded him of how to do it. Sometime around then Gold starts getting memories from previous dark ones and the terrible deeds that they had done, and so he stops torturing Killian and asks him to remove the dark curse, and Killian agrees on the basis that Gold tells him what Maleficent and co were planning. Killian then made contact with us and asked us to pick himself and Gold from the sorcerer’s house”

“Gold told Killian what they’re planning! What are they planning?”

“I’ll tell you when we get back to the loft- it’s not a conversation that should be done in public. Also I need to talk to Snow first for later. I’ll see you when you come off shift.” David was off- about what I wasn’t sure, but when he said that it was a conversation best left for the apartment… I knew it had to be serious.

** Killian Jones **

I was allowed to leave a couple days after admission (thank the gods) and I returned to my apartment, only to find August’s motor bike outside. Once I was inside he graciously caught me up on everything that had happened since I had been in the hospital- David and Snow had revealed to Emma what they had done to Maleficent’s child, and then August had convinced Emma to forgive her parents (I did wonder why he wanted advice yesterday). David knew I would be seeing August today and had told him that he and the lady Snow would be coming around later on to ask or discuss something (he didn’t know the details of what Charming was planning himself). And true to form David and Snow arrived a little while after August left, but their faces suggested that whatever they had to say wasn’t going to be good.

“Gold helped us with a couple things when he sobered up yesterday, and he’s given us the location of Maleficent’s hide out.”

_Why do I sense a ‘but’ in here?_

“We need Emma to break down a wall and she needs some encouragement. She tried earlier but couldn’t find enough emotions to do it”

_So you want me, Storybrooke’s resident invalid to “talk” to Emma, make her feel enough emotions so that she can break down a wall and fix everyone else’s problems?_

“That’s a very pessimistic way of seeing it but yes essentially that is it”

_Great. I need a can of spray paint and the location of this hide out._

“Okay… why exactly do you need this?” Snow asked when David told her what I required

_You’ll know when you see it. I’ll tell you when to send Emma tomorrow._

Snow sent me the location of Maleficent’s hide out, and I wasn’t even surprised at its location. I had gone under the cover of darkness, knowing that Maleficent would be in town to the morning and wouldn’t see this message seeing as her “secret” entrance was on the other side of the ridge.

With my preparations in place, I text David to tell him that at 11 tomorrow morning, he had to bring Emma to the other side of the ridge, and well as sending him a brief drawing of where I was referring to so he knew where to go. Now all I had to do was get back to apartment and wait for the sun to come.

** Emma Swan **

My mom woke me up after another fitful night of sleep. Since I have tried to get into Maleficent’s hideout I have been losing more and more sleep- because I am supposed to be the saviour, yet I am useless at doing what seems to be a simple task.

“Come on Emma, we need to get going”

“Why? It’s not like it’s worked any other time, why should it work today?”

“Someone found a soft spot in Maleficent’s hideout- you should be able to smash straight through it, for it’s a shallow wall rather than the however thick the other one was. Please Emma, we have to try”

“Fine. But I need coffee and some time to get dressed”

“Of course, take as much time as you need” she said as she began to go back down the stairs to the rest of the loft. My bed was warm but her words were stirring my emotions- if someone had found a weak point in the secret lair of the dragon I should really go check it out. _But you should have been the one to find it_.

On getting downstairs I could see David already checking his pistol, and Mary-Margaret handing Neal over to Granny. I was ready for this; well… at least I thought I was.

On getting to the place which had been marked as the area I needed to blow up, it was very evident that Killian had been here; perhaps with Robin for inspiration, but this was definitely Killian’s doing. There was a spray painted target with an “X” marks the spot in its centre, along with “ ** _I know you hate me, but I you need to channel that anger into this wall. I know you can do this_!** _”_ Even though the message was painted in, I could clearly see Killian’s hand writing in it. And he was right, I was angry with him, and from that anger I could feel my magic surging towards my hands and onto the stupid target, and as it crumbled, I realised that I was no longer angry with Killian anymore- just upset. Upset because I didn’t trust myself to trust him when I thought he thought that I was so shallow that I would care that he didn’t have two hands, when in reality he probably just wanted to be the same as he was when he was a good, and honourable man in the navy Although he already was honourable and loyal and-) (I should stop myself there before I break down). I was sad because only now was it clear to me that these past three months must have been hell for Killian. I had an army of people ready to support me here in Storybrooke, but I had taken everyone away from him (no wonder David kept breaking my ‘no Killian rule’) (no wonder Henry was so downcast when I told him about that). Little did I realise that Killian had been here all the while- and I didn’t notice his presence until I saw his and David’s forms heading through the settling dust to attack Maleficent whilst she was down.

I joined them in bringing my gun out and heading into the dragon’s lair. I could hear a struggle and a scream, then five shots very close together before everything stilled. As the dust settled I could see Killian holding his side, whilst David was checking Maleficent for a pulse. A small nod between each other and Killian walked past me with an honest and sincere smile on his face, but it was still small, and filled with self-loathing. _Oh Killian_.

“She’s dead”

“You sure”

“There’s no pulse- plus she would still be trying to kill us”

“Let’s all get her out of here then and tell Storybrooke that it is now safe to walk the streets again”

He turned to deliver the news as I took a closer look at Maleficent’s now dead body. She was oddly peaceful, and she was now with her daughter, at least. Thankfully the bullets were all either in her heart or just beside it, meaning she didn’t suffer- which is surprising seeing as who killed her (That was Hook, not Killian) (Killian didn’t torture people-not since he met you).

When I emerged a team lead by Whale was going into the cave with a stretcher and a body bag, whilst Dad had just finished addressing the crowd of people who had gathered.

“I’ll see you at Granny’s later. I’m going to check to see if she got Killian too badly”

“I should come, and then I can heal him if he’s hurt badly”

“It’s okay Emma. I can already see Regina over in that direction so he’s sorted. We’ll see you at Granny’s okay? I’ll see you later Emma” He didn’t give me a chance to tell him no before he walked away. A loud cheer came from the Merry men as I could see them lifting up Killian, but no sound came from Killian. I could see Regina, Robin and David at the back of the group heading in the direction of Robin’s camp.

“You coming honey” Mom said quietly, knowing to not startle me from my thoughts

“Yeah. I’m glad that’s all over” I said as we started to make our way back into town.

** Killian Jones **

I felt as Maleficent drew her claw along my side, but our shots hit her heart and she stilled before more harm could be done. I wasn’t proud of killing her, but I knew it was either her or Storybrooke. David glanced over at me before leaning to check for a pulse. I could hear Swan’s footsteps as she came deeper into the cave to where David and I were. I held my side to try and stop at least some of the bleeding. _I’ll just get Regina to patch me up a bit so I don’t have to go to the hospital for a few more hours_.

As I exited the cave I saw the group of worried townspeople who had gathered to see what was going on. I turned left to see the Merry men along with Robin and Regina waiting for me, and Regina wasted no time in healing my side, while Robin threw me a spare shirt so I wouldn’t have to walk around with only shreds on (that  earned plenty of laughs from the Merry men). I was going to head back into town when I felt Little John pick me up from behind (god knows how he got the name little John, the man’s the same size as Anton!) and they all cheered me as they carried me towards their encampment, and had anyone been looking at me, they would’ve been able to see my smile from a mile around.

“You know that you’re going to have to come to celebration at Granny’s later” David called from behind the group and I motioned to him that I wouldn’t be going “You Killian Jones are coming whether you like it or not- however we are going to have a small celebration here first on the victory that you commandeered for Storybrooke and we are never going to let you live it down!”

“You don’t want to argue with him hook, he’s not going to change his mind. And if he does then I won’t meaning the Merry men won’t” Regina then called. It was a feeling that I had forgotten over so long of not having it, yet for the past few months I hadn’t even realised I had. I felt belonging in this town, something I had never felt on dry land before (and considering that I am 385 years old I would say that that was certainly something) (I could practically feel Liam’s presence in the air, a comforting blanket after all that had happened today)

Even outside of Granny’s you could hear the celebratory shouts of Leroy and the others, and when Will opened the door to head inside only then could you get a true idea as to how loud it was in there. Little John placed me down beside ‘my’ table underneath the fairy lights (where once upon a time I had kissed Emma after our trip back in time) (although at least now I understood the Marty Mcfly reference).

_You have five minutes to compose yourself Jones, and then I’ll be dragging you in by force. Try to leave and trust me you won’t get far._ Robin’s words were comforting, for he at least understood that I wasn’t ready to see everyone and for everyone in Storybrooke to know about my… unfortunate accident shall we say- What I was less pleased with was that Robin was still going to make me go in there and face Emma.

_Why? It’s not like I actually did anything today_

_Other than Killing Maleficent, finding a way into her lair, and then giving Emma sufficient motivation to actually break down the wall_

_It’s not like that motivation was for anything good_

Robin shrugged as he turned into Granny’s, where he was immediately handed a pint of beer. I smiled at my friend’s joy, but it didn’t reach my eyes (or my heart). I knew that if I went in there I would be forced to see Emma again, but this time she would be able to see me, and no doubt she would ask questions. Questions that I wouldn’t be able to answer because she would pull me aside into the corridor and no one would be there to translate for me. Although there were many people that I could talk to and would happily tolerate me, I knew that Emma trying to talk to me tonight was inevitable. _I guess it’s time to face the music._

Wall to wall Granny’s was filled with the citizens of Storybrooke, each rejoicing in the heroes latest victory and the towns new found peace. As I entered the room many people stopped talking and turned to stare at me- because most people hadn’t seen me in months, and the last time they had heard from me was before I ‘betrayed’ Emma, before (in their eyes) I broke her heart (she had broken mine, but hers never wavered).

“Glad you could finally make it Jones, we were about to toast to the new victory” Victor said as I approached the bar.

“What can I get you tonight Jones?” Ruby asked from the other end of the counter, sensing that Granny was about to try and talk to me (Granny never knew about me, Ruby had kept her promise and stayed quiet, knowing that Granny was more likely to tell Emma)

_Some beer thanks Ruby_

I tried to limit my hand movements to try and make it less noticeable that I was using sign language, but Granny was already giving me an odd look, so she was close to figuring out what was wrong with me and why I didn’t say my order.

“Killian, can I talk to you for a minute” My time had run out- Emma was already trying to talk to me and I had only been in here for less than five minutes. I stood up and followed Emma to the hallway where we had kissed after she returned my heart to me. It’s funny, how the simplest of places can have such importance.

“Killian I know I haven’t been entirely fair on you, for pushing you away when you had done nothing wrong. I know that now- I just… I was angry at you for thinking that I was so shallow and that I saw you as an invalid for only having one hand… And I realise that telling you that you couldn’t see anyone in my family was wrong, and I’m sorry it took so long for me to realise just how bad I had made this for you” _Oh you have no idea Emma_ “Please say something Killian, I need to know what you’re thinking”

I pushed Emma away from me slightly so that I would have enough space to sign to her, even if she couldn’t understand me

“Don’t push me away Killian Jones I deserve an answer- I may have been crappy to you lately but you will not push me away!”

“Emma, he didn’t mean it like that” David had snuck into the corridor somewhere along the line and stopped Emma’s yelling.

“What are you even talking about? How long have you been seeing Killian?”

“Since you told me not to. He wasn’t pushing you away to tell you to leave- he was pushing you backwards so he could tell you whatever he was going to say”

_Thanks David, You’re a life saver_ I signed to David, and Emma glanced at me doing “Jazz hands” as Henry so put it, before realising that I was signing to David

“No problem Killian”

“Why are you signing Killian? Am I that intimidating to talk to that you won’t even speak to me”

_I’m signing because I can’t speak_

David repeated what I had signed, shocked that I would be so willing to tell Emma that I wasn’t as she remembered- although he could understand that I was backed up into a corner and I had no choice but to tell Emma.

“No…” Emma started to back away from her father and I, her hand covering her mouth, tears on the verge of spilling from her eyes. I could feel David place a reassuring hand on my back, a mild attempt to stop me from thinking what was already thought- _she thinks I am an invalid; Bloody hell._

Emma went back into the main area of Granny’s leaving David and I in the corridor. Even though I could understand Emma’s shock, it didn’t stop me from feeling ashamed of what I now was.

_She’ll come around- just let her get over the shock of it_

_I’m surprised you ever did_

_Don’t ask me how I did that impossible feat because I’m not entirely sure how that happened myself. We’d better get in now, people are about to finish toasting to Storybrooke’s newest era of peace and quite a few people will notice if we are missing._

I let David lead me into the main section of Granny’s, where immediately Ruby gave me the drink that I didn’t get to pick up, and Henry came and barrelled me down into a tight hug.

“Are you ok Killian? Mom said she had to heal you after Maleficent got you” I knew that Henry hadn’t started learning sign language yet so I simply nodded and I felt his small (but growing) body relax against me. In the corner of the room I could see Emma talking to her mother about something, but every so often she would send a glance in my direction.

“Can I get your attention please?” David called out, Robin and Regina standing beside him, sending the entire room into silence.

“Today marks the last day in our fight against Maleficent- but we should take some time to acknowledge the people who help us but never get any credit. We have to thank Belle and the merry men for doing most of the research, but they had help.”

“Not to mention this man was the one who actually supplied us with a battle strategy, as well as finding out how to get into Maleficent’s lair, and even under went torture because he was helping us.”

“So let us raise a toast to a true, but understated hero; Killian Jones!” I chocked on my drink as Robin called out that last bit, but I was even more surprised when people actually started cheering for me.  I felt everyone start to surround me, (in what they meant to be in a friendly way) but all I could feel was panic. I ran to the door in a bid to get away from the closing wall of people, and when I heard someone shout my name, I didn’t stop to listen. I carried on running, until my legs carried me to the place where this whole mess started just a few months before.

Looking up, I could see the branch to where I had tied my noose. The top of the rope was still there, an ever present reminder of what I had done, and the pain I had caused to those who had cared about me.

“KILLIAN!” Emma’s shout reached me before I could see her. But she was alone, not even David beside her as she ran towards me on the rock that was underneath the branch.

“Oh my god Killian what was that? Everyone kind of just went mad saying to stop you before something happened to you or you did something stupid **again**. Could you tell me?” I raised an eyebrow to her ridiculous question, a fed up look in my eyes “I know you can’t talk, but can you draw it or write it?”

I stood up causing Emma to take a step back, but instead of grabbing a stick and drawing in the mud, I simply looked up to where the noose had been, where the top half stayed as a reminder to what I had done.

“You tried to kill yourself” Emma whispered, her voice breaking all the way through. I just nodded in return, and once again, Emma surprised me. She pulled me close and kissed me, just like we had before this all started. When we broke apart, she rested her head on my shoulder, and even though I couldn’t hear her crying, I could feel the wetness of her tears through my shirt, and I too allowed myself to let out the tears that I had held in for so long.

And for once, everything seemed to be good again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! This chapter has been really difficult to write- but now its over! (not to mention its way longer than the others) It may take a while on the Epilougue however, so please, just be patient with me. I have really enjoyed hearing from you guys and what you think about my stories so please- Comment and Kudos please? They really make my day. I love all you little Owls!


	10. Epilogue

** Killian Jones **

I revved the engine to warm up on my Harley Davidson Street 750, awaiting for August’s battered old bike to come around the corner so we could go out for a ride into the outside world as a way to get a breather from the close knot community of Storybrooke (apparently I wasn’t the only one who found it difficult sometimes to be in such a small town). After the last fight, August and I had become good friends, him joining our drinking group, and I joining him on [motor] bike rides.

Over the past two years more people in Storybrooke had learnt sign language, the curse on the town line was broken, I had become an author somewhere along the way (not in the sense as Henry, but I still wrote out the stories of the people within this town, and publishing them so the world could know the truth whenever they bothered to read my version of events) (And that happened a lot because my books had somehow ended up being some of the most popular books on the shelves over the course of a year). Some people who had come across with the curse had moved out into the world without magic, and in turn some people from the world without magic had moved into Storybrooke. In the summer time many people from the cities would come to Storybrooke as a small town summer holiday (I will not say vacation, however much Emma and David try to correct me)

Many of the businesses had expanded since Storybrooke had joined the “real world” as Emma put it, and a few had even offered me jobs, but I was quite content as the harbour master, with occasionally helping Belle in the library (although that didn’t happen anymore because she had an army of Merry Men awaiting her orders) (Even though Anastasia had returned and Will had gone to be with his wife the Merry Men still treated Belle as though so she was one of them still) (I was always grateful for that).

Rumpelstiltskin made somewhat of a recovery, but the memories of the dark one still cause him pain, something that usually wakes Belle up at night (she tells me about the nightmares whenever she next sees me, because the crocodile isn’t the only one who needs support in this time).

The soft rumble of August’s bike pulled me out of my reverie, and as I mounted up, I spotted Emma at the window, her face just about visible in the low morning light. I blew my love a kiss as I started to ride away, catching up swiftly with August and the others (not too long after the curse on the town line was lifted, a few bikers came through on their annual road trip, and ended up staying longer than they anticipated. Not long after they officially moved to Storybrooke with their families they invited us to join their group) (I was surprised they even let me stay after they found out that I had no voice) (I said my thanks by buying them all beer) (Needless to say they liked that).

The woods flew past us and changed into the towering skylines of Boston, they roads became more and more populated the further we went into the city, before we stopped outside a bike café that just happened to be close to my publishers (usually I would leave my line of work at home but the once the publishers found out that I would be coming into town for a bit they decided that they really needed to see me and that it couldn’t be done over a phone).

“You headed off to the publishers Killian?” August called from the other side of the group. The others had a tendency to yell whatever I sign to them to whoever is listening- something that always proves infinitely useful over the harmony of engines from which we ride, but it also meant that August got my message and in turn said that he would take my bike to where he could watch it whilst I went to this meeting.

The building in which my publishers resigned worked almost as a mirror for the amount of glass that covered it, but the inside was a little more humble- apart from the marble floors in the lobby. I had come here so much that some of the receptionists could recognise me and buzz up to my bosses that I was here and that the translator should be ready by the time I reached the floor. Just like in Storybrooke, the routine to this building never changed (although I was certain it wasn’t under a curse to keep it that way); I would come and check in at the reception, then an elevator would be called to take me to the eleventh floor, I would meet my translator for the meeting, my publisher and the board would then greet us with coffee before pulling us into the meeting room. In all these processes, the meeting room was the only thing that ever changed; for sometimes it would have a projector and huge board table, whilst other times it was almost set up as a mini library. Today it was a plain board room, empty apart from a big stack of books at one end of the table which I immediately recognised as my own.

A group of five men stood around the table slowly, as if awaiting a funeral march; but none took their eyes off of me. I recognised most of them, one being my translator, one my illustrator, another the book designer and then finally my publisher- I did not recognise the fifth man who was sitting next to my publisher; but I knew I didn’t like the way he was looking at me, as though I was his next meal.

“Welcome back Mr Jones; we’re sorry we didn’t give you as much warning as we usually do but this was important and we couldn’t do it over the phone”

_That is fine; you’re lucky that I happened to be coming into the city today_

“I hate to interrupt but can we please just talk like regular men! Have you been told as to why you have been brought here today Mr Jones?” The new man said, irritation and impatience lined his voice, almost resembling disgust and venom when he was talking to the men next to him.

_Well that’s fine by me if you know sign language because I happen to have no voice so please shut up before I come over there and punch you in the face- regardless of who you may be._

My translator was trying his hardest to keep a straight face, as was everyone else in the room apart from the newcomer who was being insanely rude to everyone else just because he thought he was of a higher status to him.

“Mr Jones, this is Mr Adlersflügel, he is from another publishing company who is considering taking on you so they would get all the rights to your current books and any other books you may publish in the future”

_What do you mean by rights?_

“As in they could, if they so wished to, publish your book under someone else’s name, or allow someone else to continue your stories for you whilst you did something else. Also your books would look different amongst everything else”

Mr Adlersflügel looked between me and my current publisher (I could never remember his last name, so I always called him Steve) with a questioning glance, I later found out it was because Steve wasn’t supposed to know anything that would happen if I moved to his company.

_No offence mate but I’d rather stay here at Majesty publishers for at least then I have some control over my stories and the rest of it. Now if you don’t mind; I’ll be off to join my friends and forget all about this little incident. Have you received the latest part Steve?_

I started to stand up and gather my things when Steve nodded in conformation. Mr Adlersflügel looked absolutely livid and I really couldn’t find it in myself to care- I was happy where I was, and staying with Majesty books because it meant I could still live with Emma and Henry in Storybrooke (because another author I knew who went to another company was forced to move away from where he was- and I wasn’t going to have that)

When I got back to the café where I left the others I found that it had become very busy over the past hour or so that I had been gone for, but thankfully August spotted me first and waved me over to where the group was sitting towards the back of the café. Most of the guys were talking about particular parts in their engines that they wanted to fix now that they had done another long journey (they could never find faults on the short drives around town, but on a long drive all the problems would rear their ugly heads). August had bought me a fizzy drink of some sorts just before I walked in so it was delivered as soon as I sat down next to him.

 _What did they want?_ August enquired

_Another publisher wanted to take me on- I refused and ended up getting a pay rise for my loyalty to them. All in all it went well._

_Did you see the other guy you would’ve been working for?_

_Yes, as well as insulting him._

_You didn’t punch him did you? Because he could potentially sue you for that_

_No I didn’t punch him, although it was incredibly tempting to I must admit. Steve thought it was hilarious. Are you and the guys ready to head back?_

_Yeah we were all just waiting on you._

I went to stand up to motion for the others that it was time to return to Storybrooke, and most followed suit without any complaints, whilst others grumbled a bit because their bikes were a bit uncomfortable. One of the few things that I enjoyed about not having a voice was being able to enjoy the small chatter which I always missed. It was in this small chatter you can really get to know how someone is feeling, or how they feel about certain topics. Of course once the engines were started there was no way to hear the others so everyone was in their own company for the following few hours as we began our ride back home.

Considering that we had left just before 9 in the morning, making it back before five was somewhat of a small miracle; but it was one that I was very happy for, because it would mean I would have a bit more time with Emma and Henry. It had been just over nine months since Emma and I had gotten married, and I had adopted Henry (only because he wished it so- I didn’t want to push the lad into something he didn’t want).

As soon as I opened the door to our flat I heard a “Hello handsome” from the kitchen, signalling that Emma was in a good mood and indeed awake. As I entered the surprisingly spacious kitchen I could see my wife in full, the high curve of her belly refusing to be hidden, even under my biggest shirt (Emma was always stealing my clothes these days, but I really didn’t mind, because no matter what Emma wore, she was always breath taking, but my shirt was definitely an added bonus). We had discovered Emma was pregnant just three months after our wedding, and now at seven months the twins were refusing to stay hidden. I could remember clearly the day that Emma started showing, although on the day it was more one of confusion for me and worry for Emma

…………………………………….

_Along the corridor from the kitchen I heard silent sobbing coming the bedroom where currently Emma was getting ready for work, and I turned everything off to run to Emma’s side._

_She was sitting on the bed, her jeans thrown hastily on the floor, with her head in her hands._

**_What’s wrong Emma? Is something wrong with the little one? Is…_ ** _Emma grabbed my hands to quieten me and to stop my trail of thought._

_“It’s just… None of my jeans fit anymore, but it wasn’t supposed to be this early…” Emma said in between her tears. I hated to see her like this, even though it had happened a handful of times, I still hated it._

**_What do you mean Emma?_ **

_Emma reached for my hand and placed it on her lower abdomen, where I was amazed to find that it was most certainly more rounded, and on pulling Emma up I could indeed see the small bump peeking out of Emma’s usually flat stomach. I instantly understood what was going on; for a couple of the men from my motor bike group had said that their wife’s were overly emotional over everything when they were pregnant, but I also realised that this would be stressful for Emma for the last time she had this she was in a jail cell, alone and afraid._

_I pulled her close and let her simply cry out onto my shoulder, letting her know that I was there for her, even though I couldn’t say it._

_“Thank you Killian. I don’t know how I was able to go those months without you here, you always know how to comfort me”_

**_Trust me Emma, I’m never going to leave your side. I’m not going to do what Baelfire did to you._ **

…………………………………….

I smiled at the memory and at Emma, at how far we had come in our lives; alone for so long but here we were married and with children on the way. Despite Emma’s fears at first about having twins, we were both feeling more prepared for them. As of yet we haven’t named them, but we knew we had one of each, a little prince and princess to love, cherish and raise. Henry was going to be staying with us this week, then a week with Regina; a system that we had had since Emma and I had gotten married- for that way Henry would have equal time with each of his families.

Ever since Maleficent had fallen Henry had been on a mission to learn sign language so that he could talk to me by himself, along with Emma. Henry was faster at picking up the language, but immediately decided that now I had two hands he could introduce me to some of his video games (I wouldn’t tell him this, but I am rather impartial to Assassins Creed: Black Flag, and I play it whenever Henry is at Regina’s), but we have since grown closer, and now more than ever I think of Henry as my son. I could never replace Baelfire as Henry’s father, but I sure as hell could be there for the lad when he needed me; which was more than I could have anticipated. Now that he was a teenager Henry would often come to me for sage advice on various subjects, including girls, and his place in the world (needless to say they were both interesting conversations) and what subject he should study at college. Seeing as Henry was joining us tonight I had already plugged in his PS3 so when he returned from his job at his grandfather’s shop we could all just settle down for the night.

“Hi mom, hi Killian!”

“Hi Henry”

_Hello lad, did you have a good time at the shop?_

“It was surprisingly busy today, some people were moving into one of the new houses so they wanted to get some furnishings. What’s for dinner mom?”

“Mac and cheese tonight Henry”

“But I thought we were having pizza tonight” Henry complained

“Well you can blame you brother and sister for that they’re the ones who are craving it tonight” Henry groaned but kept a smile on his face. He understood that his mother’s cravings could change incredibly quickly, and if that happened it meant that Henry would be getting about three portions of food; that was one side of his mother’s pregnancy that he was okay with, along with the fact that he was about to have two younger siblings to look after, love, and most importantly, annoy.

As I sat down on the living room floor to join Henry, I realised that despite everything that had happened, and everything I had lost, I finally had found my home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sooo sorry that this has taken so long to finish, but hey, its here now! I would have hhad this finished earlier but I've had a few computer problems and also it was quite difficult to word in places. But this is the Epilogue. Meaning this story has come to an end. But I have a new multi-chapter that I'm working on which makes up for the lack of fluff after the season finale and the rest of this story. Thanks for reading my little owls!


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